Monday, September 26, 2016

Anniversary thanks

Today would have marked my 24th wedding anniversary.

All I would like to say to her is thanks for the wonderful life we shared.

Just thanks.

Sunday, September 25, 2016

Wise words

"Grieving can be habit forming and after a while we need to move on. Retreating into our own small world and its painful security will not protect us from further dangers...but it may keep us from savoring the world-its beauties and relationships, which are also passing, and which our loved one would want us to enjoy to the full."-Martha Whitmore Hickman

I continue to be quite a head case but words such as these really resonate with me and I'm so appreciative that authors such as this have put them down in written form.

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Times 5!

I saw a male in his home recently who is actively dying due to metastatic renal cell cancer.

I spent some time with his 84 y/o wife and wanted to make sure she was doing OK.

"I'll get through it. He'll be the 5th husband I've buried."

Her response took me by surprise and I didn't ask any follow-up questions.

It was great to have had someone to share everything with and to divide and conquer all of life's many, often daily, challenges.

I'm just so stunned at the thought of this woman having done so 5x's.

Monday, September 12, 2016

It's that time of the year again

Last year the month of September really sucked.

I recently got to spend three days with my daughter, which was GREAT, so that so far, this year, September just sucks  (note the absence of "really").

It's easy to understand why (birthdays for Tori, my son and my Dad all fall in September, as well as my wedding anniversary) but the depth of my sadness still takes me by surprise.

Things, in general, are less intense for sure but so many special dates in the same month seems to just amplify the issues related to grief that I've been dealing with for the last 14 months.

There's one big difference this year, however... I know I'll get through it.

I know I'll get through it.

Sunday, September 11, 2016

15 years

Our life changed in an instant on 6/18/2015.

So many other lives changed in an instant on 9/11/2001.

God bless all the families and our country.

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

# fourty-seven

Tomorrow would have been T's 47th birthday.

I'll make sure to reach out to everyone who is sure to remember.

I suspect I'll hear from some of them before I've had a chance to contact them.

She was loved/admired/respected by all.

It was pretty awesome to have been her right hand man for almost 26 years.

Monday, September 5, 2016

A good reminder

"It's easy to become disillusioned with the circumstances of your life compared to others'. When I am consumed by my problems-stressed out about my life, my family, and my job-I actually convey the belief that the circumstances are more important than God's command to always rejoice. To be brutally honest, it doesn't matter what place you find yourself in right now. Your part is to bring Him glory."

"Frankly, you need to get over yourself. It might sound harsh but that's seriously what it means."-Frances Chan

Sunday, September 4, 2016

A well placed canvas

"Faith is not knowing what the future holds but knowing who holds the future."

My daughter placed this quote on a canvas and it's been sitting a top our piano for years.

I've walked past it to numerous to count times-so many times that I stopped reading it.

I've been increasingly worried about most everything lately; actually, almost to the point of feeling completely overwhelmed.

The canvas recently caught my eye again.

I've been reflecting on the quote Ellie picked out, from so many she could have chosen, and conveniently placed in my path as I make my way around our home.

It's helping to settle me into a much better place.