Wednesday, August 26, 2015

The 60% that mattered

I've read that in most marriages that work there is at least an approximate 60/40 split in chores/duties between the wife and the husband.
Our marriage worked.
I know I did 40% but I've also realized that the 60% she did was the really important stuff.
I faithfully washed the dishes, took care of the yard, took out the trash/recycle bins and always helped with dusting, cleaning windows and vacuuming.
T not only worked full time but she also did all the grocery shopping, cooking and bought all the essentials at Target and Costco that kept our family supplied.
I would often go with her on errands but would wonder around the stores looking for items for me while she was always purchasing things needed for the family.
When I looked at her day planner for the first time while she was in the hospital it took my breath away.
Besides work, she had entries for multiple meetings each week, reminders for our dog as well as notations about calling and scheduling dentist, ophthalmology, and allergy appointments for our children as well as when to send in money for the college funds.
She paid all the bills each month-some on line and others by snail mail, balanced two banking accounts and also kept a Quicken program updated to consolidate all the information.
I've finally gotten sort of a handle on many of these things but there were a lot of anxious moments spent trying to get access to accounts in which she had all the passwords as well as learning to navigate around stores now that I needed to actually be the one buying things for the family.
My 40% helped our marriage work but her 60% kept our life together as a family so perfect.
She was amazing.

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